Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 2 October 2013

image for Putin in the frame for Noballs Piss Prize
I am your man lad has told the gong committee

Bloodyvostock - The bastard son of Pope Karol Wojtyla heads next year's nominations for the global PR gong after manfully jailing three protest singers from Russian girl band Pussy Riot.

"It's made the world a safer place," committee organizer Dim-Eatery Madasaherring said as Vlad 'The Impaler' Putin's name went to the top of the Noballs leaderboard.

Other nominees include ex-UK Prime Monster Tony B Liar and alleged Islamo-fascist terror plotter Samantha Looseweight.

Putin's proposers have cited his modest and unassuming way of getting fast results in a realpolitik agenda dominated by drive-by shootings, mystery bomb blasts and poison umbrella incidents.

Nominations were also considered for the Russian leader's ex-wife Lyudmilla to receive the prestigious anal - er...annual! - award for her 30-year service to marital humbug.

However with Putin's imminent nuptials to former Olymipic rhythmic gymnast [sick] Alia Kabaeva on the horizon award committeeorganizers felt less said about the first Mrs P the better.

Her own upcoming wedding to Kazakh champion weightlifter Rugamoz Balakirov may now be postponed until after the 2014 award ceremony.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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