President Clinton Lost Nuclear Launch Codes While Being Pre-Occupied With Monica Lewinsky

Funny story written by Bureau

Thursday, 21 October 2010

image for President Clinton Lost Nuclear Launch Codes While Being Pre-Occupied With Monica Lewinsky
"Whoops! Doggone It!"

According to a new book out by a former general who served as the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff during the Bill Clinton presidency, Mr. Clinton lost the coded page for a nuclear attack. What's more, another general at the time says Clinton could not deny it because too many of them knew about the incident.

"He thought he just placed the coded pages upstairs at the White House," Lieutenant Colonel Patterson told The West Coast Post.

"We called upstairs, we started a search all around the White House for the codes, and he finally confessed that he in fact had misplaced them. He couldn't recall when he had last seen them. He didn't even remember if they were at the White House when he saw them last or if he had misplaced them at the Pentagon."

Several people had to keep their mouth's shut at the time as ANYONE who found them could have sold them to the wrong people.

"You cannot launch a nuclear attack without those codes", stated Patterson.

Apparently even Monica Lewinsky was told to keep her mouth shut -something that she had a hard time doing in the late nineties -especially around the President.

Asked about Lewinsky knowing about the missing nuclear launch codes, the former general replied:

"Who do you think found the things there where they had fallen out of the back of the middle drawer in that desk in the Oval Office?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more