Local Man Became Teacher to Mooch off State

Written by UWGB-Beek

Thursday, 30 September 2010

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Jerry Reed admitted to his seventh grade class that he really doesn't care about teaching as much as he cares about collecting great pension money from the state.

"Kids, you need to get into teaching because of the sweet pension you will get, and the easy cash you will get for just showing up to class. You won't find another job were you really don't have to contribute to your pension, and the state contributes ten percent of your salary towards your pension," Mr. Reed said to his class.

Mr. Reed who is known as a man that shoots straight from the hip, because he is so unoriginal it is the best cliche to describe him. The description also fits him because he just says whatever he wants to the class because he has tenure, and doesn't feel the pressure to teach anymore.

"I knew Mr. Reed really didn't care about teaching as much as cared about his Captain America comic books, but he convinced me that teaching is a nice racket to get into, because who really knows if Social Security is going to be around when I want to retire." Denis Moore, one of Mr. Reed's students, said.

School administrators were mad at Mr. Reed for making such statements about teaching being such a great deal for nice pensions and easy cash, but after checking the facts, well, Mr. Reed wasn't lying to his students.

When asked if he had anything else to add to this story, Mr Reed said this: "I took some graduate classes in education, and they were easier than my undergraduate classes. The system really works for the teachers."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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