President Obama Considers VP Biden's Newest Iraq Strategy

Funny story written by Philbert of Macadamia

Monday, 6 September 2010

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"I have a plan!"

Washington DC: President Obama is not optimistic about Iraq's stability when all American troops leave in December 2011. What if Iraq has not yet formed a government, does not have an oil revenue sharing plan and Iraqi's continue to kill each other?

The president asked for new ideas and VP Bidden responded with an update to his Iraq strategic plan. The plan still calls for splitting the country between the Kurds, Shiites and Sunnis. However no group has to physically move! An international consortium of electronics companies will develop a force field/shield and a software controlled transporter device. The price tag is to be $500 billion.

A force field will be put around each separate ethnic community, enclave, village or settlement in Iraq. The transporter device will only allow similar ethnics to transport through the shield, e.g. Kurd-Kurd, Shiite-Shiite and Sunni-Sunni. It is highly unlikely that any distinct group will blow itself up. However, there are still the issues of mixed ethnic marriages and same sex marriages. Software will ultimately solve the former problem. The latter case is given a low probability, as there are no gays or lesbians in Iraq or the Arab world.

The president realized that this approach only solves the problem of Iraqi's killing each other. VP Bidden indicated that one out of three is good. Besides for another $500 billion the force field/shield can be placed around Iran or along the US Mexican border!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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