Man Claims Voice in His Head Has Tourette Syndrome

Funny story written by Charpa93

Tuesday, 24 August 2010

image for Man Claims Voice in His Head Has Tourette Syndrome
Stop it!

Joe McClusky, a deeply religious man, says he's been battling with the voice in his head for going on ten years now and he's tired of every word coming out of the voice's mouth being the eff word. "From the time I get up in the morning, to the time I go to bed, it's 'did you brush your effen teeth you effen moron?' and 'if I effen have told you effen a hundred effen times, keep your effen thoughts to your effen self.'"

That's just the point, claims McClusky. The voice in his head has tourette syndrome and it's getting in the way of every other thought Joe has in his head. "I certainly have sympathy for the folks who actually have tourette syndrome themselves and show outward signs of the affliction, but it is nothing like having a voice inside your head that has tourette's. You can walk away from someone on the street. You can't walk away from something inside you."

McClusky has been to shrink after shrink and he's taken medication that normal sufferers of tourette's takes, but it doesn't help. "What it does do is slow me down so I can't even fight the guy in my head sometimes and he just lets the f-bomb fly constantly. In fact, sometimes he just says that and nothing else. How would you like to be sitting in a nice restaurant, with your parents and your fiancé, trying to hold a decent conversation and the voice in your head just goes on and on and on with fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k, fu*k?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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