Bar Patron's Urine Magical Juice for Prolific Corn Plant

Written by Charpa93

Thursday, 19 August 2010

image for Bar Patron's Urine Magical Juice for Prolific Corn Plant

A single corn stalk plant that is growing in front of a tavern in Mason City, Iowa was discovered to have 27 ears of corn growing on it-that is approximately 25 ears more than any other average corn stalk has growing on it in a growing season.

The bar owner claims she traded her dairy cow for three corn plants with a farmer from Minnesota and upon bringing them back to Iowa, planted them around the Tavern. Two of the plants planted in front progressed regularly and ended up producing two ears of corn each, but the other plant, which Sally planted in a separate place on the side of the Tavern grew taller than the other two and produced 27 ears of corn.

"We were flabbergasted," claims Sally Shucker, the owner of the Tavern. "We couldn't figure out how this could have happened. Of course, I put plant food on the plants and mulched the ground, but other than that, I didn't do anything special."

The patrons at the Tavern were also puzzled until one night, one of the locals, Bud Coors, drunk as a skunk, headed outside and his pal Mickey decided to follow him out to make sure he was ok. He saw Bud head right over to where that corn stalk stood and relieve himself on the ground around it.

Mickey went back in and told Sally and from that night on, they watched Bud every time he'd go out the door, he'd head straight for that corn stalk.

Scientists from Iowa State University have approached Bud to take a sample of his urine to see what it may contain to have had such an impact on the plant, but so far Bud has refused to give a sample since he believes it is a trick by his employer to finally get the goods on him and fire him from his bus driving job.

Meanwhile, attempts to get Bud to urinate on the other plants out front are futile. "Bud likes to urinate away from the lights of the parking lot. He likes his privacy," said Mickey.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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