The President has had a massive attack of the shits over the last two days, and the White House said that it is not easing up. Senator Smith from Texas, believes that Obama contracted some kind of virus from his recent meeting with Dictator Hugo Chavez. Senator Smith says that lately Obama has been kissing so much ass, that he became complacent when bending over to kiss Hugo's butt. He believes that the President got lazy, and got to close to the center of the Dictator ass, thus contracting some type of bacteria.
The White House was quick to respond saying. The President has kissed more ass than any other President in history. President Obama has a strict policy of kissing ass at the three o'clock position, and always stay's right of center. Press Secretary Robert Gibbs goes onto to say that, the President has never been complacent when kissing ass, and that safety is always his first priority when bowing down to leaders from other countries.
Gibbs continued saying this is just more GOP propaganda, and that they are standing by their original statement, that this is George Bush's fault.