Washington, DC: US President Obama has no intention of swimming up the River Ganges in a show of solidarity with Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh, sources in the White House have stated.
A certain source from the Prime Ministers' Office in India had clearly indicated that hopes were raised after photographs of Mr Obama swimming in the Gulf of Mexico flashed all across Indian TV screens on the night of India's 63rd Independence anniversary.
"Since Mr Obama has shown that he's game to swimming about in troubled waters, it would have been an excellent show of US-India solidarity, if our two great leaders Obama and Singh would swim across our ancient River," said a prominent politician, unwilling to be named.
"The Brits are bent on giving India a bad name, and have even named a drug resistant bug after New Delhi. What better way to show that Indian water is safe than a swim up the Ganges," said a famous holy man from Benaras as he floated upside down in the water, "It would build up confidence between our two countries, a kind of water-mark.
Mr Obama showed real respect for Hindus, when he declared Diwali a national Holiday in America, and the Great Committee of Gurujees felt that a swim up the Ganges would not only cleanse the American Leader's soul, but solve his country's financial crisis as well. "The Ganges accepts all: corpses, rotting flowers, dead men's ashes, sewage, and what-not, and then turns everything pure and holy. A bath in the river at Varanasi will definitely be a more exciting and rewarding experience for Obama than at that Gulf of Mexico," a spokesperson commented.
'Nothing beats the thrill of floating beside a half-roasted cadaver covered in shrimps. It's life changing,' agreed an American Adventurer, who is now known as Swami Heebijebs Ananda."If such a thing happens, we'll have to torpedo the whole event," said an inflamed General from Pakistan, hastening to add that he only meant it 'figuratively, ha, ha.. umph.'
In the meanwhile, the American source has firmly indicated that Mr Obama is restricting himself to swimming around former oil-slicks, and refrained from spilling any more beans.
