Hog Jaw Daily News - Star International Writers Convene In Hog Jaw

Written by Skoob1999

Monday, 16 August 2010

image for Hog Jaw Daily News - Star International Writers Convene In Hog Jaw
Hog Jaw - None Of That Gay Stuff Goin' On There

Hog Jaw, Arkansas, Tuesday - Mayor Humphrey Dumpty today took a break from his day job of running the five and dime to welcome a famous internet satirist and some British 'bloke' to the town airstrip, where they were flown in by Edson Bugler in his crop spraying biplane.

Pon touching down, the right honourable Abel Rodriguez - out of San Antonio, Texas - and the British feller exchanged pleasantries.

Abel Rodriguez told the Brit feller that he wasn't as tall as he expected him to be, and ast him why he wasn't wearing a long black coat and a hat.

The Brit feller laughed, introduced hisself as Skook or somesuch, shook hands with the Texas feller and ast him if this was where the chupacabras hang out?

Mister Rodriguez smiled, told the Brit feller, heck no - the chupacabras hang out in Texas and New Mexico, and offered the Brit a genuine Texas enchilada. The Brit politely refused, saying that since he got his teeth knocked out in a violent incident, he was having 'a spot of bother' chewing. Going on to explain that he is due to get his teeth fixed next month because he has finally found an NHS dentist, thanks to President Obama's health care initiative.

The formalities over with, Mayor Dumpty took the two internet writers downtown, having ascertained that there was a possibility that Hog Jaw could be made famous by satirical articles on the internet, pretty much like the Isle of Wight in England.

Mister Rodriguez and the Brit feller were most impressed by the barbershop, ole Jacob at the hardware store, Fifi La Ranch at the Hog Jaw Tavern, Vern Baker, Editor of the Hog Jaw Daily News, and Cripple Creek off of Elm Street.

The Brit feller ast Mr Rodriguez where it wuz that the shrimp could be caught, pon which Mister Rodriguez smiled, shook his head and explained that shrimp was all the way down to the Gulf of Mexico, lurkin just underneath the oil slick.

A civic reception followed, hosted by Lenny the lumberjack and his purdy wife Loreena. Mister Rodriguez and the British feller agreed that Hog Jaw, Arkansas held good potential for a series of comedy based news articles. Providing they didn't include transvestites or bullfighters in flashy suits.

More as we get it.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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