Retired President George W Bush announced today he has accepted an invitation to make campaign stops throughout the Midwest in support of his fellow Republicans.
"I am delighted to have extended this invitation," said a Democratic Party organizer, "And for him to have accepted. We hope to have him speak in support of Republicans everywhere that his policies have had an impact."
Mr. Bush's first event was at an auto plant that recently closed as a part if GM's restructuring. "I plan to tell you the people that we need to keep the government out of the auto industry," Mr. Bush told reporters. "While the initial round of financing to prop up Chrysler and GM came during my Administration, I never approved of actually returning them to profitability, as President Obama has done. That smacks of socialism and if there's anything America hates, it's anything that Republicans can stick with the name of socialism."
Reporters asked if Mr. Bush supported current efforts in Congress to extend unemployment benefits. "Absolutely not!" Mr. Bush replied. "I've been out of work for nearly two years, and I don't need a single dollar. Unemployed Americans should do as I do, and ask Daddy for a little cash if they need it."
Rumors that Republican Party operatives had begged Mr. Bush to stay away could not be confirmed at press time.