Tony Blair Receiving Liberty Medal from America No Big Deal, Really

Funny story written by Charpa93

Friday, 2 July 2010

image for Tony Blair Receiving Liberty Medal from America No Big Deal, Really
Did you hear? Georgie? I'm getting some horseshite type of medal from you American blokes come September.

Breaking news out of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania this morning: America's National Constitution Center has named England's Tony Blair as their choice to receive their annual Liberty Medal. He is set to receive the honor in September from former President Bill Clinton.

Some are wondering why Mr. Blair is receiving this honor in light of the fact that he was such a huge proponent of former President George W. Bush's Iraqi War. While that argument is all well and good, if the good people of England and America could just step back for a moment and look at the bigger picture, they would see that the honor is quite insignificant and nothing at all to get one's panties in a bunch over.

After doing a little background investigating, we have learned that previous recipients of this honor have gone to such notables as Sarah Palin, Saddam Hussein, Kermit the Frog and That Girl in the CoverGirl commercials, as well as Twiggy and U2's Bono. Once you start giving liberty medals to everyone, it kind of dilutes the whole meaning of the medal. So stand down, people. Stand down. Tony Blair is not in such illustrious company.

Another piece of information that has turned up in our investigation has to do with the medal itself. We have since found out that it is not cast in any precious metal such as gold, silver or even titanium, but actually has a plastic core dipped in cheap gold plating. And, the medals are made in China. In fact, we went dumpster diving for the receipt for the National Constitution Center's purchase of these medals and have found that they ordered the requisite minimum amount of 1,000 in order to receive a 10% discount off the original price of $.37 per piece.

So all in all, today's news isn't so bad. A world leader touting war and sending troops under his watch to go to a foreign country to die for nothing more than America's control of oil is getting a medal from America that's supposed to say he was a champion of Liberty--happens all the time these days. They're giving out Peace prizes to war-time Presidents. Word in the wire is that the Global Council on Environmental Change is giving their "Golden Pelican" award this year to BP Oil CEO, Tony Blair.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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