Saturday, 5 June 2010

image for Las Vegas Oddsmakers Taking Book On Reasons For Al And Tipper Gore Divorce
Is it the John Edwards' excuse?

Las Vegas oddsmakers are making book on the real reason why the 40 year marriage between Senator and Former Vice President Al Gore and his wife Tipper is ending.

While the two have issued a joint statement saying that the marriage has dissolved because they have drifted apart, 99.37% of all Americans do not believe that statement (and the 0.63% who answered otherwise based their decision on a coin flip).

According to the oddsmakers, possible reasons for the divorce (and their probability) are:

32% Al had an affair and there is a love child involved
21% Al had an affair, but there is no child or pregnancy
18% Tipper had an affair
12% Tipper has cancer (also known as "The Edwards Excuse")
7% Al packs the fudge (he's gay?)
7% Tipper's a rug muncher (she's gay?)
3% Tipper's pissed that Al never gave her credit for helping to invent the internet

FoxNews has promised a new program to be called "The Gore Watch" which will update the odds on a daily basis and give evidence for any of the favored reasons as it becomes available.

Note: There is no truth to the rumor that Al Gore will be the next "Celebrity Bachelor" or that Tipper left Al because she said their bedroom life was "too bland for even a record rating."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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