Zsa Zsa Gabor calls Elizabeth Taylor 'a slut'

Funny story written by queen mudder

Saturday, 10 April 2010

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Slut: Wallis once threw a plate of cucumber sandwiches at the old trollop

Hollywood - (Fur-Will-Fly!): Their mutual loathing of each other is legendary, much like Wallis Simpson and the Queen Mother.

And this weekend Zsa Zsa Gabor slammed bride-to-be Elizabeth Taylor 'a quadriplegic slut' after a glitzy wheelchair-posed engagement announcement to Janet Jackson's PR guru Jason Winters.

"I hear Elizabeth paid her plastic surgeon half a million dollars for a vagina retread," Hungarian socialite Zsa Zsa chuckled.

"But the ageing process was so advanced she had to have a transplant - from a pig! - instead."

The 93 year-old Hungarian diva says she won't be going to her former daughter-in-law's upcoming nuptials to PR pro Winters, 49.

An ancient feud between the two goes back to her shagging stepson Conrad 'Nicky' Hilton on the eve of his May 6 1950 wedding to Miss Taylor, "that's kinda put the kybosh about a wedding invite."

Hollywood Celebwatch site LA FagHagSlagMag reported this weekend that a much outwardly rejuvenated Taylor, 78, stands to win a $5 million bet from the Hilton Foundation if she goes ahead with the May 1st wedding, equalling Zsa Zsa's own record of nine.

Looking radiant and very blingful at a Bel Air Hotel party last night Miss Taylor's famous - albeit 78 year-old - decolletage was completely obscured by an estimated $50 million of diamonds and platinum.

Hollywood sources have long maintained that the real reason between the movie stars' spat is Elizabeth Taylor's divorce aquisition of much of the fabled Hilton Family jewellery stash - something that eluded Zsa Zsa's own divorce lawyers' remorseless attempts.

The Star of Bangalore alone is worth $20 million.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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