Subo blamed for US shortage of red wool

Funny story written by Nae mair crap

Saturday, 27 February 2010

image for Subo blamed for US shortage of red wool

"Wool for all seasons" magazine has reported a shortage of red wool in many US states.

Shelves in craft stores are reported to be cleaned out of red wool while stocks of other shades of wool appeared to be plentiful.

The craft store chain, "Make Your Own" , with branches throughout the US is completely out of red wool and has none in storage at their central warehouse.

Dwayne Armbruster, managing director said,

"I have been in this business for 40 years and have never seen anything like this. Women have been appearing at all our stores and interrogating my staff about the shortage. It has become necessary to employ additional security personnel as many of these women become stressed and weep uncontrollably when they realise that we have no red wool in stock"

Mr Armbruster has revealed that a truck, due to deliver red wool imported from abroad, was hijacked by a large group of screaming banshees after the driver parked in a TruckStop to take a scheduled break. The truck driver attempted to prevent the women stealing his load but was knocked down and trampled as the women carried the load to waiting SUV's with number plates clearly showing that they came from many northern and midwest states.

Scratching his head he said,

"We believe that the red wool is being collected by an unofficial subo fansite and is taken to a secret storage facility as the great leader of the fansite intends to control the market in red wool"

He exclusively revealed that all stocks of red dye in his stores had been security tagged following an incident in a Brooklyn, New York branch of "Make Your Own".

Two women were allegedly detained after an employee noticed red dye dripping on the floor of the store. Security cameras showed the drip falling from a bible. The employee called security who chased and caught the dastardly duo, who blessed him for not understanding, by following the trail of red dye. The hollowed out bible was not recovered.

Further updates when we get them.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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