Moorview Wing Opened In Rehab Clinic

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Sunday, 31 January 2010


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Inside The Moorview Wing

World renowned rehab clinic, The Priority, deep in the heart of rural Hertfordshire today opened the doors of its new wing, The Moorview Wing, named in honour of a collaborative story in the Magazine Section of popular satirical website which famously makes no bones about tackling head-on such serious issues as mental illness and addiction syndrome.

The ribbon-cutting ceremony was performed by honoured guests and collaborators on the Moorview saga, Bargis 'The Tripod' Tryhol, Jalapenoman, Abel Rodriguez, and Captain Morse, who all flew in from the USA in order to attend the celebrations.

Cardigan-wearing pinko liberal psychiatrist, Dr Elwood Blouse told assembled dignitaries that the Moorview Wing would split its intake between sex addicts and psychopathic serial killers, with overflow space for the odd drug addled musician.

Dr Blouse declared that the extra capacity would be put to good use, and praised the writers for consistently bringing attention to the plight of the twisted and the sexually deviant.

"It's a good thing," Bargis Tryhol told us. "So good in fact that I've offered my services on a voluntary basis. If Katie Price or any other uber breasted English rose should ever require a good hip-knocking session, then I'm your man. Once ole Bargis has been in the lobby rooting for these ladies, they'll never yearn for another man."

Captain Morse was equally enthusiastic, telling us:

"Just the thought that our work has enabled large breasted celebrity women to seek solace in the Moorview Wing makes my heart beat a little faster. But it isn't all about women..."

"That's right Cap," Jalapenoman agreed. "They'll be treating guys too. Cases like oversexed golfers, sissy soccer players and children's TV presenters who can't keep it in their pants. It's a whole new dawn right here before our very eyes."

Contributor Abel Rodriguez was positively beaming as he gazed at the huge new Moorview Wing.

"It makes me feel real proud to be a part of this," he said. "The thought of all those hoo-ha's, dooh-dahs, (blanks) and thingummyjigs taking refuge in a facility inspired by us is a truly humbling experience. But we shouldn't forget that this concept was nurtured from infancy by my fine friends the J-Man and Bargis. Hey, where'd Morse go?"*

*Captain Morse was discovered a short time later examining the tramp stamps of Brit lady crooner Amy Alehouse.

For more on Moorview as we get it, check out Magazine Section

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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