Schlesinger Tipped For Energy Post

Written by Joe Leff

Thursday, 6 May 2010

Former US Nuclear Energy Secretary, James Schlesinger, became the first person to end up as a court-yard light post.

Mr Schlesinger, who died suddenly last week, had strongly advocated the harnessing of human radiation sources, and had made prior arrangements for his body to be preserved after his death.

Technological advances have enabled 'radiation-heavy' cadavers to be embalmed as rigid, 'hardwood' corpses.

Mr Schlesinger's feet were set in concrete close by the east gate of the White House inner court-yard. A permanent glow was activated when 'luminol' - a white radiation-catalyst paint - was applied to the top of Mr Schlesinger's bald head.

Energy scientists reckon that "these light sources will last for over a hundred years."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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