Following the example of Accenture, Inc. and Tag Heuer watchmakers, a conglomerate of agencies and foundations have banded together to announce the termination of their commercial association with Tiger Woods.
At a hastily convened press conference in the Hotel Excelsior in Rome, the conglomerate's spokesperson, Hyle Ittler, Esquire, outlined exactly which groups were axing their endorsements of the horny duffer.
According to Mister Ittler, they are:
The Silvio Berlusconi Home for Wayward Girls
The Roman "I can screw anyone I want" Polanski Defense Fund
The Congressional Nubile Interns' College Fund
The Somali Retired Pirates Association
The Cannibalism Appreciation Society
The Taylor Swift Singing Academy
The Nancy Pelosi Facial Restoration Enterprise
The Putin Association of Assassins Anonymous
The Columbian Cocaine Cartel Opera Fund
The Thai Pretty Boy Club
"These associations no longer wish to have their good names dragged in the mud with Mr. Woods," said Mr. Ittler.
