WASHINGTON DC - According to my source, Heinze Kissinger, Obama has been rated the 'worlds most interesting man' by a large beer company owned by one of his former presidential rivals.
In secret talks between the beer company and Obama, it was put forward that people are now bored with the current 'most interesting man'. Apparently they don't think it is very interesting to drink beer not 'often', and shave even less often.
Obama is to take the role of 'worlds most interesting man' starting in 2010. His contract ends 2012, December 22.
The new contract pays ten times what he currently makes; he intends to donate the proceeds to Alcoholics Anonymous.
Obama plans to move back to Kenya and drink aspartame flavored beverages, which interestingly, make you even more high than beer does, once this new contract expires.
In the meantime, he will live in a condo where he can be filmed with the Whitey house as a back drop - beneath him.
Also signed in the same deal to fawn over him while he drinks beer on TV, along with Mrs. McCain:
- Sarah Palin
- Hillary Clinton
- Oprah Winfrey
- Queen Elizabeth
- The Popes wife.. soon to be made pubic