Sotomayor: Wise Latina Woman Better than Horse's Ass

Funny story written by Bureau

Wednesday, 24 June 2009

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Supreme Court nominee, Sonia Sotomayor, has spoken out for years about how her experiences as a Latina woman have influenced her decisions as a judge. "I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experiences with a whole different view of the world and workplace would, more often than not, reach a better conclusion than a white male Horse's Ass who hasn't lived that kind of life or anything close to it," she has said in speeches.

Sotomayor is a Catholic as are most Latina women and Horse's Ass men, and she has said that "a wise, Catholic, Latina woman who is a graduate of Yale law school would do a better job than a Protestant, Jew or Muslim Horse's Ass who hasn't attended parochial school and fantasized about being the Big Enchilada Horse's Ass in Rome."

Sotomayor graduated from Yale law school and she has said that "a wise Latina woman who is a graduate of Yale law school would reach a better decision than a Horse's Ass who attended an inferior law school, like East Podunk State. The Horse's Ass professors at Yale law school are better than the Horse's Ass professors at East Podunk State, and that a female law professor could outdo both Horse's Asses."

Sotomayor is a little overweight, most Horse's Asses estimate 250 and she has said that "a wise, fat, Catholic, Latina woman who is a fat graduate of Weight Watches could reach a better decision than a thin Horse's Ass who hasn't lived life in the fat lane."

Sotomayor also admits she is a graduate of the Ugly Stick many times over but maintains that a fat, ugly, Latina woman as a Supreme Court Justice would make better decisions than a skinny white Horse's Ass

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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