WASHINGTON, D.C. - The hip-swiveling, Colombia singer Shakira performed at a White House dinner in honor of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez.
The erotically sensual Shakira performed her hits including "Whenever Wherever," "Ready For The Good Times," and "Underneath Your Clothes."
She also did her latest hit, which has been number one in Colombia for 27 weeks, "Yes, I Have A Concealed Weapon - My Hips."
Shakira who the American Medical Society recently named, "The Performer With The Fastest Hips on Earth" said that she first learned that she could make her hips do some tremendously unusual things when she was in her mother's womb.
Her mother Sha Na Na said, "It's howa you say...true. When I was two months pregnant with Shaki, sometimes during dinner I could feel her shaking her hips. One time, I think it was Tuesday, Shaki she kicka me so hard that she knocked two sardines offa my plate.
It was embarrassing but our pet monkey Malagooti ate them. Another time while I was visiting my aunt Gina, and all of a sudden my stomach she start agoing witha back and forth, back and forth movement, kinda like when a married couple is how you say...formulating (EDITOR'S NOTE: I'm sure that Sha Na Na meant to say fornicating.)
Sha Na Na added that it was unbelievable, but she swears that when she was three months pregnant she could actually hear Shaki singing, a little pitchy like judge Randy always says, but it sounded alright.
She said that she could not make out any of the lyrics but at least she did manage to stay on key. At four months Sha Na Na said that she was able to make out some of the song words such as pacifer, playpen, potty, rattle, and rich Colombian coffee.
President Obama was asked what he thought about the stunningly lovely 32-year-old Shakira. He smiled, put down his glass of grape Kool-Aid and said, "I swear that the little Colombian mama can flat out shake those totally kissable hips."
When asked if his wife Michelle would be jealous to hear him talk like that Brobama smiled put down his Hostess Twinkie and said, "Heck no. The First Mama ain't no teenybopper. Shucks, my woman's got more moves than U-Haul and Ryder both put together."
When told that Shakira had said that she thought that the president was tall, dark, and handsomely cute, the president grinned, tossed a couple of Tic-Tacs in his mouth and said, "Now that's, what I'm talkin' about."
Meanwhile in CD Land, Madonna is getting ready to release her 219th album which is entitled, Songs I've Recorded Before But Which I'll Now Shove Down Everyone's Bored Throats Again.