Washington AC/DC - (X-Files Mess): An alien crop circle that virtually destroyed Michelle Obama's newly planted White House herbaceous border was identified today as possibly the work of an Iranian-groomed UFO.
The geometric 'Two Finger' etching appeared on the White House lawn before invading the Rose Garden and Mrs O's curly kale nursery bed.
The CIA's X-Files division promptly cordoned off the area as a metal detecting team began the painstaking task of panning for extraterrestrial metallic isotope traces.
Last year the Pope complained that the Iran-registered UFO had blown up his chopper and attacked the Rev Sun Myung Moon's own Sikorsky Skyhopper.
A nasty diplomatic incident could be in the effing....er, offing.