Written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 18 April 2009


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CHICAGO - PlayDude Magazine has just announced that they have won the battle of the dozens of men's magazines that were vying for the rights to have England's singing sensation Susan Boyle appear in their magazine.

Miss Boyle will appear as PlayDude's 'Miss May.' She will be photographed by one of the world's best known photographers, Parisian-born, London-bred Beauregard Gillooly.

The magazine is not revealing what Miss Boyle is being paid for her 'spread' but a very reliable inside source, with the initials, S.L. said that he actually saw the check and the amount is $2.8 million.

Shantae LaSalle said that Ms. Boyle will also be receiving a 2009 Bentley, a three year supply of Chanel #5 Perfume, and a 24-carat gold toe ring.

Boyle's manager, Simon Cowell has stated that he is currently in negotiations with various companies to produce everything from Susan Boyle Kiss Me T-Shirts, to Susan Boyle Virgin Cherry-Flavored Lipstick, to Susan Boyle Lazy Susans, to Susan Boyle Inflatable Dolls.

Mr. Cowell revealed that he has given Beauregard Gillooly complete permission to photograph Miss Boyle using his British countryside estate, Bad Manners Manor, as a backdrop for the PlayDude photo shoot.

An unnamed source revealed that Cowell has even agreed to have the singing siren pose in his master bedroom's spacious bed; a bed which Madonna has called the biggest bed that she has ever seen and/or been in.

One of Cowell's English maids said that the bed which takes 45 minutes to make sleeps 12 adults.

In a related story. Miss Boyle has just been signed to record the title song to the new James Bond movie, The Blond Spy With The Golden Balls.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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