Obama - "Scots Safe In My Hands!"

Funny story written by iscrivener

Friday, 10 April 2009

image for Obama - "Scots Safe In My Hands!"
Obama's Tartan Army

Barack Obama, almost 8 months into his presidency of the US, is a hero of his nation's black liberation struggle and one of the new Afro American autocratic "big chiefs."

In recent months, his early grip on power has strengthened along with his popularity among black Afro and Muslim heads of state and designated terrorist groups, leading his government to enter into power-sharing arrangements with such organizations as the Abu Nidal Organization, al-Qa'ida and the black wing of Fianna na hGàidhlig.

The aforementioned rivals struck their power-sharing deals in March 2009 after more than a month of wrangling brokered by the former "black double agent" secretary of state Condoleezza Rice. The deals signaled that President Obama was willing to cede some authority to some of his biggest rivals.

Despite the accord, Obama's Democratic Party proceeded to grab all key ministries and appoint provincial black anti white leaders throughout the American nation.

In the meantime, America's most fundamental white public services - including sanitation, water, public schools and hospitals - continue to disintegrate under the fierce scepter of the new revolutionary American apartheid system instigated by President Obama and his First (but not last) Lady Michelle.

Furthermore new legislation is been discussed in the higher black echelons of the US military to oversee Whites been stripped of their citizenship, legally becoming citizens of a self-governing heartland state based in Death Valley.

However in a gross act of leniency one group of white exemptions will apply to all Whites who can prove their Scottish ancestry, based on the president's goodwill, been of Scottish ancestry himself, on the proviso that gadgies will only bonk big fat black mommas and wee lassies will only shag well hung black boys!

A black Afro military spokeswomen stated that the "mass removal and relocation of all US Whites, except those of Scottish ancestry, to the Death Valley region would begin on 4th July 2009 and be completed by June 19th 2011 when Juneteenth will traditionally become the new and true Black Independence Day of America!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more