Two Greedy Employees Really Take The Cake

Funny story written by Bureau

Wednesday, 24 December 2008

image for Two Greedy Employees Really Take The Cake
Fruitcake "Fruitcakes" Ate Was Covered With Fudge

Two postal workers sparked a worldwide data theft alert after stealing a Christmas cake and replacing it with a different package.

The courier workers gobbled the cake down and simply put its address label on a parcel that was supposed to be going to Germany's LBB bank in Frankfurt.

The bank package which contained the personal details of thousands of customers everywhere in the world who were warned their accounts might have been compromised.

But the mystery was finally solved when the computer discs eventually turned up at the home of the family who had been expecting a beautiful Christmas cake.

"What a pair of idiots. They caused an international police operation and terrified a lot of customers just because they felt a bit peckish," said one police source.

"I hope it was a fruitcake, because the two of them are fruitcakes, and I hope the thing sits in their stomach all year."

A postal employee stated, "I hope it comes out in big chunk and give them hemrhoids for the rest of their lives."

Another "I hope it comes out in bigger chunks and splits their asses wide open!"

Another "I hope they both die a lingering death as that thing's orange peeling curl around their intestines!"

Several others said they all wanted them to die a hard death in several colorful descriptions included choking to death on their own puke.

All agreed this was the "giving" season and should be filled with gratitude and forgiveness.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more