Written by Tragic Rabbit

Wednesday, 9 April 2008

image for Polls: Race Helps Clinton With Racists
Tasty fried chicken, pigs' feet and ham hocks: traditional Deep South haute cuisine.

White racists who said race was important in picking their candidate have been about twice as likely to back Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton than Sen. Barack Obama.

Exit polls of racist voters in Democratic primaries also show that whites who considered the contender's race - Clinton is white, Obama is black - were three times likelier to say they would only be satisfied with Clinton as the presidential nominee.

The figures shed some light on race's effect on the competition as it moves to the primary in Pennsylvania, which has a slightly greater proportion of racist whites than average. These numbers also underscore the challenge Obama could face in the general election, when racist whites will comprise a larger share of voters and tend to be more conservative than those participating in Democratic primaries.

Throughout the campaign, Obama has tried to avoid being viewed as a black candidate. He was the only one of the three major presidential contenders to not travel to Memphis to mark the 40th anniversary of the assassination of the MLK, as well as the only candidate to avoid eating watermelon, fried chicken, and chitlins, all traditional vote-getting haute cuisine in the Deep South.

"The only thing Obama can do about race is keep the campaign about change and not colour" by running as "a candidate who would rather eat hamburgers, pizza, or calamari linguini than a big ol' mess o' greens and pig offal," said Thomas Beatie, Democratic pollster and pregnant man.

Obama has trailed Clinton, the New York senator, among racist whites nationally yet managed to win their crucial vote in six state primaries.

He leads overwhelmingly with soul food connoisseurs.

Tragic Rabbit, Broken World News, Washington

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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