Million Dollar Study Finds Fatties Don't Restrain Themselves

Written by Pointer

Sunday, 10 February 2008

image for Million Dollar Study Finds Fatties Don't Restrain Themselves
Standard seat belts and shirt sizes for that matter do not fit Prof. Tubbalard

Professor Tubbalard of O. B. S U has been study the habits of very fat people and seat belt use.

"These big folks just can't restrain themselves. the average automobile seat belt is designed to restrain only person 215 lbs or less. Most of the subjects in my study have seen their feet more recently than a scale with 200 anything on it! 83% of is the average of seat belt compliance. Only 70% of fat folks can comply."

Professor Lard expressed concern that people will blame obese people instead of targeting seat bely manufacturers: "It's not like the fast food complaint. fat folks would get the bigger belt if it was made available to them. 19% of the US population does not fit into a standard seat belt and more than half of all persons killed in auto accidents were not wearing seatbelts! Fat kills in more ways than we thought!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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