Written by Felix Minderbinder

Monday, 1 October 2007

image for Giuliani Says He "Is Prettier" Than Hillary Clinton
Everyone's worst nightmare

NEW YORK (FMLiveWire) - Rudy Giuliani says he can beat Hillary Clinton since he "is far prettier than she is."

The former New York cross-dressing mayor with the screwy personal life is a GOP curiosity with unorthodox positions that conservative voters hate.

"I'm the only Republican candidate who can beat her," Giuliani says. "Looks and fascism will count in the 2008 presidential election, and I have both."

Both Giuliani and Clinton are front-runners of their parties in national surveys.

Giuliani has been married three times and hails from the liberal fortress of New York. He supports abortion, amnesty for illegal aliens, North American union, gay rights, and gun control measures. Conservatives consider him to be a "closet Democrat."

Giuliani claims to be the only GOP candidate able to deliver big Democratic states such as New York, California and New Jersey.

Giuliani also says he is "the liberals' worst nightmare," although many conservatives consider him to be their worst nightmare too. Others say that Giuliani is everyone's worst nightmare, and a greater evil than Clinton.

Giuliani proudly says "I am a warmonger, and my presidency would mean a Hitler-like expansion of military interventionism and preemptive war. I am a threat to freedom, constitutional government, the rule of law, morality, and to national sovereignty."

As for Clinton, she says "I will beat that crazy queen! I've got it where it counts."

--Copyright Felix Minderbinder Live Wire

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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