Washington - (Faux News) Senators approved a new entitlement program to be funded and operated by state governments. The new plan allows for the provision of special handicrap parking emblems to be issued to people suffering from loose bowls, enlarged prostates, or who just like to eat a lot of Taco Bell food.
Senator Ted Leavens(D) who serves on the senate "Ways and means to go" committee described it like this; "A handicrap sticker will allow one to enter any public or private establishment or residence, at any time, free of charge, for the express purpose of promptly relieving themselves in the manner they may choose. Americans should never be discriminated against solely on their race, age, religion, gender, sexual orientation, or toilet preferences."
