Pervy Queens lawyer busted with 'anti-masturbation gum' and Alberto Gonzales blow-up doll

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 23 July 2007

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image for Pervy Queens lawyer busted with 'anti-masturbation gum' and Alberto Gonzales blow-up doll
The life-size Gonzales blow-up rubber doll comes complete with all orifices lined in sandpaper

New York - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): A sting operation on a pervy Queens Legal Aid lawyer, Peter Barta, has stunned New York cops by the amount of 'kinky' material found in his Kew Gardens apartment.

Barta, who lives at home with his Mom, hid a treasure trove of pervy sex gadgets including 'anti-masturbation gum', twenty thousand hard core porno mags, a 'Grow Yourself a Girlfriend' toy and a lifesize inflateable Alberto Gonzales rubber doll with all the requisite orifices lined in sandpaper.

Barta, 32, has been indicted after being caught using a spy camera at work in the women's bathroom where he spied on female colleagues changing into their work clothing.

He was busted after his female colleagues realised that he was a peeping tom and planted surveillance equipment trained onto his disguised cameras.

Barta's lawyers have made no comment about the haul of sex toys unearthed at his apartment but have admitted that since the news of the Alberto Gonzales rubber doll broke they have been inundated with phone calls asking if they knew where their client had bought the blow-up Attorney-General effigy, and even offered huge sums of cash to purchase Barta's after his trial later next month.

"As sex-symbols go this one's a sure-fire collectors' item!" said a legal source close to NY prosecutors.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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