Sober Drivers Cause More Accidents than Drunks

Funny story written by drugtestallpoliticians

Tuesday, 17 July 2007

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No baby, I've not been drinking. Yes, I'm using my handsfree!

Keginbumport, Maine (IP) - A scientific study has revealed that sober drivers cause six times as many accidents as drunks do. Statistics from the study have led scientists to conclude the extremely drunk drivers cause the least amount of accidents especially if they have become inebriated to the point that they pass out.

As a result of the study the scientists are proposing that a device be installed on the ignition system of every car that the driver has to blow into and the car will not start if no alcoholic content is detected.

Unfortunately some people may try to bypass the system by blowing into the machine with a balloon that has had some alcohol poured into it. Another way to cheat the system involves having a convivial partner blow into the system.

Scientists are now busy truing to determine if blind folks cause less accidents than drivers who can see where they are going. Another study that has been proposed will determine if dead people cause less accidents than those who have yet to expire.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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