Spiders Found Living In Boy's Ear

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 8 May 2007

image for Spiders Found Living In Boy's Ear
That's right! In one of her ears!

An Oregon boy got the shock of his short life so far, when he found spiders living in his ear. Earache, followed by a loud 'popping' sound and a mad scrambling of tiny feet, alerted the boy's mother who took him to see the family doctor.

Doctor Augustus Terror confirmed that there was, indeed, an intricate system of webs deep inside the lad's ear, with up to 10,000 arachnids 'milling about'.

Jesse Courtney, who is 9, made the startling discovery just two days after going to see the new Spiderman 3 movie at the local cinema, and is from a long line of animal-lovers. His mother, an ex-heroin addict, keeps cockroaches in one of her ears, and a vole in her hair. His father owns a tapeworm.

Dubbed 'Spiderboy' by his friends, Jesse leapt wildly around the walls of the living room of his home in Portland as he was being interviewed by a reporter from TV's Discovery Channel. Clearly not afraid, he said:

"Arachnids are a much-maligned and misunderstood species. They mean us no harm. I, for one, am happy to give them a home in my lug."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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