Oil company caters to Hollywood elte.

Funny story written by Trevelyan

Wednesday, 4 April 2007

image for Oil company caters to Hollywood elte.
Regular, Super, and now Caviar Grade?

Celebrities and other Hollywood elite have been carted to as long as there has been a Hollywood. Clothing designers, car companies, even food companies, have all lined up to produce special items to carter to the Hollywood elite. Now a new company has joined those ranks, Shell Oil Company.

They product they are offering? Designer gas. Most of us balk at paying just $3-$4 a gallon for mere regular gas. How about paying $50-$100 a gallon? Shell is betting that Hollywood elite won't even blink an eye.

What's in this gasoline to make it so expensive is simple. It's not additives to make their cars run longer, it's not even ultra high grade octane. Instead, Shell has focused on putting in whatever their Hollywood customer wants. Would you like your exhaust to smell like fresh pine? For only $75 a gallon Shell will pump your gas full of fresh pine scent so you're exhaust will smell fresh and clean.

Whether it is gold flakes or caviar, Shell will put it in your gas for a price. Many Hollywood actors have gone the food route. They have their favorite foods like caviar, crab, lobster added to their gas. The reason for this? Not only does it make them look trendy, it drives up the prices of those foods making it harder for the common man to buy them, and in turn making those foods trendier.

The fuels however, have no actual benefits besides being trendy. They won't offer better mileage, and in some cases may dramatically lower it. When asked if the additives might not be harmful to the car engines a Shell spokesman had this to say, "In all honesty? Yes, it will probably lower the life of the car engines to barely a 1/4 of what it would be in most cases. But what do the Celebrities care? They've got the money, and more importantly, they deserve trendy products that have no practical value what so ever. It's unfair to think they should have to use the same gas as the common man."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more