Ms. Brown M&M Awarded Nobel Super-Awesome Person Of The Year

Funny story written by Michael Sienicki

Monday, 17 February 2020

image for Ms. Brown M&M Awarded Nobel Super-Awesome Person Of The Year
Ms. Brown, between Mr Pink and Ms. Green

It was a landmark day for social justice and equality on Saturday, as Ms. Brown M&M was awarded the Nobel Super-Awesome Person Of The Year in Oslo, Norway. Lauded worldwide for her social activism, Ms. Brown is widely recognized for her relentless commitment to the fight for equality, and being a champion for women of color.

When announcing the recipient of the prestigious prize, chairman of the Norwegian Nobel Committee, Berit Reiss-Andersen, made the following statement:

“Ms. Brown M&M is totally super-awesome, and we are truly honored to bestow her with the prize. Her bravery and hard work is an inspiration to us all, whether it be on the picket line spitting in a police officer’s face, or through her remarkable charity foundation ‘Give Diabetes, Diabetes’, where, every month, she surprises three special diabetic children by taking them to Hershey Park for a day of fun and irony.”

All eyes were on Ms. Brown as she took the stage to accept her prize, where she was brown-ier and woman-ier than ever. After expressing her gratitude for the support of her family and friends, she delivered a passionate speech promoting inclusivity and civil rights before skipping off stage to an eruption of applause:

“...We can make EVERYTHING fair for EVERYONE! And once we do, we can finally frolic hand-in-hand through the gumdrop forest, and then slide down a rainbow made of licorice! Tee-hee-hee! Catch me! Come catch me!”

As the ceremony concluded, the internet was flooded with reactions to Ms. Brown’s massive achievement. Among those praising the M&M for her recognition was none other than Joaquin Phoenix, who himself was awarded both the Oscar and Golden Globe this year for best actor:

“Congratulations to Ms. Brown M&M for winning the Super-Awesome Person Of The Year Prize!” he tweeted. “Nobody deserves it more. Her name will go down in history with the likes of Harriet Tubman and Mrs. Butterworth.”

Not all reactions to the announcement were positive, however; shortly after the ceremony, conservative radio host and Medal of Freedom award winner, Rush Limbaugh, appeared on Fox News expressing his disappointment with the Nobel Committee for their choice:

This is a sad day for America,” he said from his throne in Mount Doom. “Ms. Brown M&M is a known anti-semite who has gone on record vocally supporting Iranian-backed Hezbollah. I, for one, am disgusted with the Committee for choosing to support such a filthy marketing character."

Despite the opposing reaction to her win, Ms. Brown is, and will remain, the 2020 Nobel Super-Awesome Person of the Year. When asked how she plans to celebrate her magnificent achievement, she told reporters that she will spend her time quietly with her life-partner, Ms. Green M&M, and their adopted child Mini Yellow M&M, whom they rescued from being put to death by ingestion in China - simply for being delicious.

Her selflessness knows no bounds, and, for years to come, her impact will resonate through the fabric of history. On a cold Saturday evening, Ms. Brown M&M proved to the world that she was unquestionably Super-Awesome.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more