Trump Orders Incarceration of All Iranians in U. S.

Written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Friday, 3 January 2020

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Iranians! Welcome to your new homes!

Mar-a-Lago, Florida. Woof Blister reporting for SIN, Spoof International News. In a terse tweet, issued in the wee, small hours of the morning, Monday, President Donald Trump directed Homeland Security agents to apprehend and incarcerate all Iranians living in the United States.

The initial tweet read "all persons of Iranian descent living in the United States." That was quickly corrected so that it applied only to Iranian nationals when Trump was told that his original tweet would have incarcerated two Republican congressmen and a prominent conservative on a federal appellate court.

Trump justified his order on national security grounds and cited Franklin Roosevelt's incarceration of American citizens of Japanese descent after the attack on Pearl Harbor. That order was later upheld by the Supreme Court. Steve Miller is alleged to have been the author of the original tweet.

Homeland Security will use camps previously built by FEMA for disaster survivors. While the camps are being readied, internees will be housed in stalls at defunct horse racing tracks.

In the meantime, Senate leader Mitch McConnell announced that there will be no further consideration of an impeachment trial while the nation faces a threat to its existence.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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