Tom Cruise To Play Slim “Maverick” Everdingle In Top Gun 2

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Wednesday, 19 June 2019

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BILLINGSGATE POST: GREAT BALLS OF FIRE! In the aftermath of the attack yesterday in which Navy Top Gun pilot, Slim “Maverick” Everdingle, scored 5 kills on Iranian camels, Tom Cruise announced that he would play the role of Lieutenant Everdingle in the sequel of “Top Gun” which is being filmed in San Diego.

In the original movie released in 1986, Maverick’s adversary was rival pilot, Tom “Iceman” Kasansky, played by Val Kilmer. In the sequel, Kilmer will play the role of Iranian President Hassan Rouhani. Rouhani, who had his faithful camel, Omar, take a Sidewinder missile in the butt, hopes that Kilmer can do justice to his new role. Incidentally, Rouhani’s call sign will be “Cash.” Reportedly, he pocketed 100 Extra Large (100 million) when then-President Barack Hussein Obama dumped planeloads of Hamilton’s on the tarmac.

Other than a brief pat on the butt between Maverick and his RIO (Radar Intercept Officer) Ensign Detrick “Dirty Trick” Detwiler, there is no romance in Top Gun 2. In the original movie, Maverick had a contentious romance with Kelly McGillis who played Charlie Blackwood, a civilian flight instructor. No replacement was made in the new script. However, it was reported that Ensign Detwiler was willing to give it a shot.

"Yo, Dude. FAKE NEWS! Not my style."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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