Frail grandma eaten by cats

Written by susan allen-rosario

Friday, 12 May 2017

image for Frail grandma eaten by cats
Apparently... she rarely picked up.

Neighbors said it was just a matter of time before Mabel became a victim of a violent attack.

Raised in a rural town near Tonsillmania, locking the the doors and windows at night was not a priority.

But perhaps it is now.

Grandaughter Matty Weaver stated that when she went to see her grandma late last Saturday night, a little voice told her to back away from the door.

"There was this horrible smell coming from the house. I imediately got on my cell phone and spoke with the police."

Detectives believe that the body that was found in the house had been there for at least 4 months.

"At this point, we don't even know if it IS Mabel. There was not a lot left at the scene. We will know
more after the lab work, DNA and other tests are completed."

Dental records will not be used or even available as Mabel never went to the dentist, stating that her
teeth were going to fall out anyway so why bother.

"We tried to get her to the dentist but she refused. My grandpa had a nice set of false teeth and when he died she used his for awhile. They did not fit very well and fell out of her mouth on a regular basis. The last time she wore them she was using a riding lawn mower, and well, no more teeth."

Friends of the family and neighbors say they will miss the old lady at the end of the block.

"We collected her mail and news papers for months. If we knew her cats were that hungry, we would have fed them for her. It goes to show that you can never really know a person or an animal can you?"

It was noted by the officers responding to the call, that there were 5 thousand 6 hundred and seventy- two voice messages on her land line.

Apparently... she rarely picked up.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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