New York, NY - Melania Trump was rounded up and taken in for questioning after a recent immigration raid initiated by the Trump administration. The raid was at a "high end" illegals party. Mrs. Trump was immediately deported despite insisting to officers that she was Melania Trump.
Noted one ICE officer, "I couldn't care less if she was the Queen of England, an illegal is an illegal."
Mrs. Trump was automatically on "the list" due to the expansion of the definition of a "criminal", which now includes lying on a website about whether you have a college degree. Mrs Trump has also been questioned for possibly entering the U.S. and "overstaying her welcome" before marrying Donald Trump.
Without due due process, Mrs. Trump was stripped of her rights and immediately deported to Slovenia, without her credit cards and separated from her son Barron. She is allowed to come back to the United States, but only legally.
When President Trump was asked about the situation at a hastily called press conference at his Mar-a-Lago resort, he denied knowing anything about the raid and deportation and blamed the media for alternate facts, stating, "Melania is at home at Trump Tower with Barron, isn't she?"
President Trump then ran out of the room to "go make a phone call," screaming "Melania!" He was later overheard on the phone while drinking at a Trump resort wedding next door to the press conference stating, "But Melania, they never told me that's what the executive order meant by the word 'criminal'"
Although Air Force One is reportedly on its way to retrieve Mrs. Trump, one friend tweeted, "She should just stay here where the government knows what it is doing."