Written by That Guy

Friday, 16 December 2016

image for Colorado Moves to Legalize LSD; Trump Responds: "Kick 'Em Out"
Mr. Smith announces that LSD is to be legal in Colorado.

One week ago, Colorado Press Secretary, George Smith, announced that the state is moving to legalize most forms of LSD. He said in a press release out of the capitol building in Denver that they were going to legalize it in the spirit that the people would be happier in the use of this "recreational drug." An excerpt from his speech is as follows:

"We in Colorado have come a long way in the last few years, legalizing marijuana, and now LSD. We hope to make more positive impacts in the future, and possibly legalize methamphetamines, and also cocaine. We think that if we are going to fail as a society, why not do it legally," said Mr. Smith.

Although the youth of Colorado was ecstatic, the more conservative youth had a few things to say. Paul Little, of the Republican Youth Convention stated that the new president-elect "wasn't going to stand for this one bit," but outnumbered and outvoted, the republicans had nothing to do with the fact that the law was passed this morning that LSD would be legal in all of Colorado.

Later in the afternoon, the president-elect announced that he was "not happy" about Colorado "pulling the rest of the country into its grave," Mr. Trump spoke this afternoon:

"Look, America, it's time to man up. We are losing bigtime. I'm tired of Colorado pulling the rest of our country into its grave. I'm Done. When I become president, we are going to kick Colorado out of the union. Our country is too great to be pulling along this ball and chain. It's up to us to start making this country wi bigly. We can't do that with you Colorado, so we're going to kick 'em out of our country, and make America great again. That was the last straw, and they pulled it bigly."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: LSD




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