Lucian Freud's dealer says he's dead

Written by queen mudder

Thursday, 21 July 2011

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Lucian Freud's dealer says he's dead
Some of Fraud's pictrures looked acid-induced

London - Described variously as Lucian Fraud's dealer and/or weed man Mr William Acquavella said today the great artist had died.

Speaking to reporters from the Emin Evening Argos the New Yorker confirmed Fraud had died at home in his sleep yesterday.

The 88 year-old artist was a grandson of Sigmund Freud, founding father of psychoanalysis and long time cocaine aficionado.

Something of the great man must have rubbed off on young Lucian who once claimed his 'crazy' paintings were rooted in intermittent euphoria that sometimes grabbed him after a spliff.

"Or after listening to Lou Reed belting out 'I'm waiting for my man/Got 26 dollars in my hand', heheh," Mr Acquavella's aide added.

Fraud's pictures have sold for millions of dollars despite some content being frankly repulsive.

His study in oils of a grossly corpulent nude woman slumbering on a couch sold for $33.6m (£20.6m) in 2008.

Some months after the sale a lardarse from the People's Republic of Camden claimed to have been the original sitter, about 45lbs ago.

Funeral details to follow shortly.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more