Trump Says, Reality And Facts Don't Exist

Funny story written by Keith Shirey

Sunday, 11 December 2016

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An extraordinary breach has opened up between the national security establishment and President-Elect Donald Trump. American intelligence, led by the CIA, has concluded that Russian intelligence, operating under orders from Vladimir Putin, attempted to get Trump elected by hacking into Democratic Party e-mails to find material detrimental to Hillary Clinton's campaign. It then turned DNC e-mails over to Wikilinks, which slowly dribbled them out to the media.

Donald Trump rejected this fact-based narrative. "I don't care what the NSA and CIA analysis is because it's based on facts and reality. But your reality may not be the same as mine and all of the facts I get come from the Internet. What I'm trying to say is that we live in a fact free and post reality world," said the President-Elect.

"Fact is just an opinion. So, if I say millions of illegal votes were responsible for Hillary's vote total, those are my facts; that's my reality. You may say that Hillary won the popular vote. Those are just your facts," said Mr. Trump.

When this reporter asked the President-Elect if he believed in the concept of truth, he responded "it's fun to defy the truth because it gets you lots of media attention which diverts their coverage of my scandals."

"I don't believe in truth anyway. You reporters live in a reality based community. But that's not the way the world operates anymore. See, I'll soon be the President and when I appoint new directors of the CIA, NSA, and FBI they're going to create their own reality and that's what the press will cover. There won't be anymore analysis of what my good friend Vladimir does or doesn't do." said Trump.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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