"Well, if I have to tell you" Is Baffling to Most Men

Funny story written by Catchthisdrift

Wednesday, 16 April 2014

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An irrational woman.

In an intimate romantic relationship between a man and a woman, it is inevitable that at some point the woman will say a sentence that begins with the words "Well, if I have to tell you." Depending on the specific relationship, sentences of this type could occur with startling frequency. These words will entirely baffle the man, likely to the point of verbal paralysis.

The intent of the woman's sentence is to imply a level of knowledge that the man, in the woman's opinion, should already know. The fact that he does not know it is an indication to the woman that the man is uncaring, unloving, inconsiderate, detached, selfish, unable to display compassion and completely out of his mind if he thinks they're going to have sex.

Objectively, the woman's expectations are wholly irrational. Her belief that the man "should already know" shows that the woman fails to recognize the differences not only between a man and a woman, but in fact differences between how any two people think and process information.

When asked about their irrational behavior, most women showed physical signs of anger and contempt, and then hurried away to confront their husband on his belief that she is irrational. Her behavior shows a deeper irrationality in that she is projecting the generalities of this article specifically on her husband. In all likelihood, he will be minding his own business when she storms in and confronts him about something he never said. Although his mind will be racing to make sense of what is currently happening, he will have clarity on one thing - he isn't having sex later.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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