Russian oligarchs revealed as Clinton Foundation bagmen

Funny story written by queen mudder

Friday, 14 February 2014

image for Russian oligarchs revealed as Clinton Foundation bagmen
An old photo of Bill Clinton from his Rhodes Scholarship daze in Oxford

Little Cock, Arkansas - Temperatures his a crazy 75 degrees at Sochi's VIP yachting marina this weekend where a motley ragbag of seedy Russian billionaires was seen toasting their tootsies in the balmy winter sunshine.

Their IDs are the subject of a media gagging order after rumors spread 'like wildfire' at the Winter Olympic Games that these mobster oligarchs have been outed as bagmen for the Clinton Foundation.

A top secret NATO report is about to lay bare the names of up to a dozen of what it calls the slipperiest, slimiest sleaze bags ever to crawl out of the KGB's Lubyanka HQ to bankroll the Clintons' latest protection racket.

Top of the list is well known Ukrainian embezzler Victor Pinchuk whose $13m donation to the Clinton Foundation has been linked to whorsemeat contamination scandals in the EU.

Next, there's bent ex-Moscow banker Andrey Borodin who, despite a $400m bankruptcy in the Russian courts, still managed to dosh up Hillary's personal war chest with a $5m bung - ok, mostly in the form of IOUs, but whaddahell, uh?

Then there's Harry Putin (no relation), a Moldovan avian guano billionaire who helped guide Tony B Liar's Faith Foundation to share a $10m 'gift without reservation' from some bent Qataris with the Clinton Mob.

Commenting on the Russian organised crime link to the former President and his family a spokesperson for the Clinton-Gore Years Appreciation Society said, 'Niet! Niet! Niet!'

Anna Chapman Kushchenko is 69.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more