Governor Chris Christie Says He'll Run In 2016 And He'll Kick Sarah Palin's Puss All The Way Back To Alaska

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 18 December 2013

image for Governor Chris Christie Says He'll Run In 2016 And He'll Kick Sarah Palin's Puss All The Way Back To Alaska
Governor Christie says that Sarah "Snowflake" Palin is a political 'has-been.'

PARAMUS, New Jersey - Governor Chris Christie has made it perfectly clear that he wants to be the Republican presidential nominee in 2016.

The popular New Jersey governor recently sat down with Amos Soursuckle of GOPicky Magazine at a local Burger Bandit Restaurant in Paramus.

He said that he has lost a lot of weight and he is starting to feel like he could play for the Brooklyn Nets of the NBA.

The governor was asked what he thought about Mitt Romney recently saying on Live With Kelly and Michael that he hopes that his 2012 vice-presidential running mate Paul Ryan is the GOP's choice to run against Hillary Clinton in 2016.

Governor Christie laughed out loud and said that Mitt "The Flip Flopper" Romney has about as much credibility as O.J. Simpson.

He pointed out that "Little Bunny Foo Foo" Ryan really has no business in politics and would best be suited managing a Long John Silver's or a McDonald's.

The head of New Jersey then added that "Lyin'" Ryan knows about as much about being a politician as Paris Hilton knows about being an astronaut.

He was asked about Sarah Palin. The governor started laughing so hard he said he almost swallowed one of his tonsils.

Governor Christie composed himself and said that Sarah "Reindeer Ovaries" Palin needs to stay in Alaska and devote herself to her kitchen duties because her lack of geographical knowledge clearly shows the people of the United States that a Ritz Cracker has more brains than she does.

The governor of New Jersey then grinned and said that if "Snowflake" Palin does decide to run in the primaries he promises that he'll kick her lipsticked puss all the way back to Wasilla, Alaska muy pronto (real quick).

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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