Moose, the gaseous hero dog from Louisburg, NC, has been nominated for Mount Rushmore. George Babcock of Lyndonville, Vermont has started the lengthy process to nominate Moose to be placed on Mont Rushmore. Babcock is quoted by the Associated Press as saying, Although Moose is not a past President of this great country, he embodies all the attributes of a great American who has come to the aide if his country in time of great need. Just because this heroic creature is not a human is no reason not to include him in this iconic place reserved for great Americans."
The Reverend T. J. McCorkle, the proud owner of Moose,issued the following response to Babcock and all of the thousands of citizens who have hailed Moose's bravery. "When I offered to send ole Moosey to the White House so he could be sent to Syria and let go a 'sneaky one' in the bedroom of old Assad, I never knew that he would become such a hero. Moose was just doin what Moosey does---let go a sneaky one. I never knew he might save thousands of lives and the world another war. We are honored by the idea of him being on Mount Rushmore. Gosh, he never sniffed anyone so high up! I mean like once he sniffed Emma Lou McPherson, President of the School Board! Sure did startle her! Her husband said he ain't never seen her so close to a smile in fifteen years!"
As news of Moose has spread and national media has descended on the small town of Louisburg, the town has taken him as one of their own. The Louisburg High School football team (the Warriors) adopted a reverse huddle in which all the players face inward and shout "sneaky one" as they break huddle. Attendees at the game on Friday night report that the opposing linemen seemed disorientated and started to retch as the next play began. The cheer leaders, meanwhile, shouted, "Run Beau Run, slip em a sneaky one!"
A reporter from the local Franklin Times stated, "There is definitely a "sneaky one" craze going on in our town!"
In related news, Time Magazine Corp has announced they have chosen Moose, The Person of the Year, for the late December issue. Also, for the first time in the history of the magazine, the front cover will be a 'scratch & sniff' paper. Several major food store chains have told the magazine they will not sell the issue at the magazine racks next to the checkout counter but will be available outside the stores near the Handicapped Parking area.
