Texas governor Rick Perry signs controversial anti-cleavage law

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Monday, 22 July 2013


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AUSTIN, TX - Capping off nearly a month of intense media coverage and legislative gobbledygook, Gov. Rick Perry, R-Texas, signed a bill restricting cleavage on Friday. The measure effectively bans all cleavage in the state.

Republicans have said the bill safeguards men by not enticing them with breasts the size of Texas. Democrats in the state and nationwide have assailed the measure as an assault on a women's right to attract men who otherwise might pass, if they raised their lines of sight.

The bill originally failed during a special session of the Texas legislature in June after state Sen. Wendy Biggins-Davis, a Democrat, successfully led a 13-hour filly-bust-er to cock-block passage. Biggins-Davis quickly became a national name, and the raucous protests at the Texas statehouse that attended her filly-bust-er made for some exceptional political theater, while tantalizing Republicans with the protesters' ample cleavage.

Perry, undeterred, quickly announced that he would call lawmakers back with a second special session to reconsider the bill and pound it through over the objections of Biggins-Davis and other well-endowed Democrats.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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