Purchasing Whoops at DHS

Written by Spicewood

Wednesday, 8 May 2013

image for Purchasing Whoops at DHS
How many?

It has been reported that the Department of Homeland Security, (DHS) is purchasing 450 million rounds of .40 caliber hollow point ammo in order to wage a "seven year war" to thwart "homegrown Terrorism."

Deke Sorrinson, Warehouse Supervisor for DHS, has been forced to rent space in storage units throughout the country. "Hey, those darn bullets started coming in by the truckload, I've never seen so much stuff. I've had to go out and rent storage sheds all over the country, we've got 'em everywhere."

Eva Murdock, DHS Public Relations Supervisor warned, "If you see some black trucks, being unloaded by guys in black uniforms, with masks, unloading black boxes, in a neighborhood near you, don't be concerned, they are just our guys."

Biff Farqhuar, reporter with GROG, in a recent interview, asked Director Janet Napolitano about the purchase, to which she replied, "How many did you say, ah, well, ah, there may have been a mistake made there in purchasing, ah, it was just supposed to be one case. He rented how many storage units?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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