When Rebekah Brooks's husband Charlie published his first book in 2009, David Cameron, Rupert Murdoch and Guy Ritchie attended the launch at Nincompoop, the West End nightclub.
The complex novel,called Fillies, covered a world Brooks knew well as a former Tic-tac man working the Epsom racecourse.
British racing pundit John McCririck, with his arms crossed and his hands flat against the chest, told eager punters at Nincompoop:
"Charlie Brooks at odds of 33/1 ("double carpet") is worth a cockle of anyone's money to romp home in the Nobel Prize".
But, according to Terry Pikey, racing correspondent for The Big Issue:
"The Old Etonian's novel got off to a flier, showed a good turn of speed, but sweated up badly and tailed off at the finish."
Now Charlie's second book is about to be published by Harper Collins:
"It's called Slags and features low life Willy Scrote. He gets involved in a moody scam with Bingo caller Eric 'Legs Eleven' Buttock, 69, and kinky pensioner Doris 'Two Fat Ladies' Slapper,88." said Editor Rupert Complete-Nonce.
"The plot involves double dealing, insider information, skullduggery, tests of loyalty, bribery and murder" according to Ex Cavalry Officer Complete-Nonce.
Doris Earwig, reviewing Slags in the Daily Mail, has compared Charlie Brooks to top thriller writers Dick Francis and Ian Phlegm and has described the novel as "mustard."
Rebekah's old man told literary critic Melvyn Blagg, in an interview at The Groucho Club, that he has now "knocked out his third novel", entitled Get Me My Shooter You Donut, and has assured Blagg it will be "blinding".
But Rita Plebb, a cleaner at Harper Collins, has blown the whistle on Charlie's new blockbuster:
"I vardered it in the karsi" said Mrs Plebb, "and i have told a reporter from The Daily Mirror that it is a load of old pony."
