Iron Age War Grave Sealed Off By Police

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 18 April 2011

image for Iron Age War Grave Sealed Off By Police
Archaeologist looking a bit unenthusiastic

Police in Derbyshire have sealed off an area after a burial site containing the skeletons killed in what appears to have been a massacre was found by archaeologists digging for trinkets.

The burial site contained only the bones of women and children. Nine skeletons were discovered in a section of ditch around the fort at Fin Cop in the Peak District.

Scientists believe that hundreds more skeletons could be buried in the ditch, of which only a small part has thus far been excavated.

A spokesman for Derbyshire Police told us:

"These deaths appear to have been of a particularly violent nature, and we have already commenced a full-scale investigation and set up an incident room. It is not going to be easy establishing the identities of the victims, but we would hope to uncover some CSI-style forensic evidence that will lead us to an arrest soon. Anyone who has any information about the deaths, or, indeed, about the Iron Age in general, can contact us in the strictest confidence on 0845 1200BC-400AD."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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