As if finding a wedding present for Kate and Will was not enough of a worry, I am now faced with another problem.
David Cameron has announced that The Spoof is 'part of the Big Society' which he is encouraging everyone to join. 'This is an excellent example of voluntary work by people who would otherwise be wasting their time grumbling about the Government. Well done, The Spoofers, all power to your elbows.'
Threats have already been coming into The Spoof's supposedly secret HQ. The Police have been called but unfortunately they are tied up with one or two other problems at the moment.
The Spoof's Director of Communications, who was recently working for David Cameron in a similar role, declared that The Spoof compared to the mass media was 'Small. David doesn't realise we are not Goliath. We are a small band of gallant contributors to the national well being, but we are miniscule.'
However Cameron's comments have already shifted The Spoof shares significantly upward on the Stock Exchange. Shares in The Spoof are becoming more valuable every day.
'That is all very well' said a The Spoof writer who only spoke to me on assurances his name would be kept out of the story 'but several of us are going around now in fear of our lives. One or two The Spoof contributors are not great fans of the Coalition Government. Tragedy awaits them if their friends discover they have become part of Cameron's Big Society.
'He's certainly put the cat among the pigeons' declared one 'this could be the kiss of death as any pigeon knows if a cat is placed among them!'