Begorrah Bejabbers the Shamrock Isle is in trouble. Gerry Adams is going to stand for Election in the Republic!
News of this disaster led to the exposure of the Irish economy to a downward spiral of confidence.
'Just the Luck of the Irish' moaned a Potato farmer from Cork 'we were doing so well, then Big Business and Gerry Adams descended on us and kicked us in the goolies.'
Gerry Adams, former IRA spokesman and current Sinn Fein leader, tried to claim the economic disaster in Ireland was nothing to do with him. But his remarks were treated scornfully by the Irish Government.
'Until Gerry Adams poked his nose into our country our economic prospects in the Eurozone were outstanding. Now we get an M.P. who won't sit on his seat and he expects us to miss the fact that he is the cause of all our troubles.'
European economies are in seige and Britain is likely to be called upon to help bail out the Irish economy. The days of the Irish Punt are well and truly over and the Euro is like an albatross around Europe's neck.
So Irish eyes are not smiling. Britain is feeling for its empty purse and preparing to let the Irish find their own way to the promised land.
